Come on, More Energy

Something has changed. I don’t know if it’s the reduction in medication or the two bags of blood, but I have more energy than I’ve had all year. It’s unreal! I’ve been able to go for walks without starting to black-out or getting light-headed. I can climb stairs without feeling exhausted at the top. I’ve been able to go back to work and haven’t been shattered when I get home. And it’s not just my energy that’s returning. I’ve been ridiculously hungry. Two weeks ago, I was lucky if I could eat a full meal, now I could eat two! I don’t think I’ll have loose clothes for much longer.

I still have most of the other symptoms, in fact, the joint pain still seems to be worsening. I have my appointment with the gastro specialist and surgical team next week, so I’ll see what their thoughts are. Maybe the Intyvio is slowly starting to work and I’m absorbing some of the other medication now. Maybe it’s just the changing drugs and 2 weeks of hospital and rest. At any rate, the having this energy back has felt like such a huge win. I’m trying not to get my hopes too high, who knows how long this will last, but to have a reminder that even the worst of this is likely temporary is a big morale boost.

It’s funny how quickly people just adapt to the situation they’re in. I knew I wasn’t 100% before hospital, but I certainly didn’t realise how much I’d been going without. I guess it’s a blessing in a way, in the same way we struggle to remember pain. I hope that if this energy starts to fade, I forget how good it feels to have it. Even if I don’t, knowing it’s possible to get it back is pretty great. Whatever direction all of this goes in over the next few months, I definitely feel more able to accept it.

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